Noah (2014)

Let me make it clear from the beginning, I do not care if a movie like this is 100% true to the bible and I could not care less about the creationist fanatics moaning about how this and that movie is telling the wrong story or is distorting their religion. But this attempt to re-tell the story is just bad. The first half of the movie is not all bad. It is actually somewhat enjoyable. The dark scenery is sometimes depressing and beautiful at the same time. I did like the watchers. It added a bit of extra to the movie and the fight when Tubal-Cain tried to capture the ark was not bad at all.…

This is a hard movie to watch and rate. The Good: The images of the flood coming from both above and below the earth were spectacular. The trauma that Noah deals with during the flood and post-flood is beautifully depicted. I loved the image of Noah realizing that the ‘sickness’ is in him as well as the others. The story-telling of creation to fall to the flood was beautifully done. I also liked the tension of Noah and the family on the ark as they wrestle with the possibility that the Creator has forgotten them. So with all that good, what ruins the movie? I do think a director/wr…

Watching Noah, it occurs to me that it must have been made by atheists. After all, they are treating the Word of God as little more than a first draft. On the other hand, though, co-writer/director Darren Aronofsky isn’t fucking around with the old "thou shalt not take the name of the Lord your God in vain," making sure to substitute the G word with the epithet "the Creator." Thus, Noah (Russell Crowe) tells his wife Naamah (Jennifer Connelly) that “[the Creator] is going to destroy the world” (after which he will presumably be known as “the Destroyer”) by way of a flood, which may ha…